Living Together? Preparation is the Key to a Good Relationship

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A very good friend of mine, Sara, recently moved in together with her boyfriend.
They decided to live together just because they want to see each other more.
Unfortunately, they fail to foresee some common problems and issues two strangers would face when they share the living space.
In the beginning, she was so excited about her new life with him.
I thought they were a great together and I was happy for her.
Within a month after they moved in, they already started to have issues.
When they received an electricity bill, he asked her to pay and told her that he would pay her back later.
So, she wrote a check from her bank account.
She told me that he never paid her back and that she didn't feel comfortable asking him about it.
The mistakes they made were that they got caught up with all the excitement of moving in together and that they did not discuss some issues and problems they could experience.
It is likely that she and he had several things that they wouldn't agree with, and it would have been so much easier to take care of those issues before moving in.
If they couldn't agree with each other on some issues, they might have decided that they were not ready to live together.
Once they move in, they might take each other for granted and it would be challenging to solve the problems especially if they are not mature enough.
Sara has been more disappointed than ever.
She expected to have more intimate sexual relationship with him after they moved in.
But, their sex life did not get better and actually got worse than before.
This is a typical situation.
The other day, Sara called me crying and told me what happened.
She told me that she had surprise guests the other night.
They were his parents.
Clearly, they were not happy that their son was living with her.
They kept telling her about their son's previous girlfriends and saying how nice they were.
When she moved in with him, she should have known that she would need to deal with his family and friends much more than before.
This was something they should have talked about when they were still thinking of living together.
If you are thinking of moving in with someone, make sure to talk about every single problem that you might have.
If both of you are mature and are able to compromise on lots of things, you are probably ready to live together.
Otherwise, it is better to live by yourself for now.
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